Spotted at an exhibition for Olde Fartes:
I think they just blew up the bottle label to human size, with no attention to the resulting pixelation.
One can find Somaderm on the Interwebs, which leads to the “Active Ingredients” list:
Looking up their NDC number helps translate the bullshit Latinesque nomenclature:
- Glandula Suprarenalis Suis = boar adrenal glands
- Thyroidinum = cow thyroid glands
- Somatropin = human growth hormone
They’re exceedingly proud of that NDC number, touting “SOMADERM Gel is the only transdermal, FDA registered product”. Indeed, it’s registered, about which the FDC has this to say:
Assigned NDC numbers are not in any way an indication of FDA approval of the product.
and
Marketing Category UNAPPROVED HOMEOPATHIC
With that in mind, consider the dilutions:
- Glandula Suprarenalis Suis = 1 part per million
- Thyroidinum = 10 part per billion
- Somatropin = 1×10-30 = there are no words
Homeopathic “drugs” never list the starting concentration or amounts in the product, but diluting something by a factor of ten-to-the-thirty ensures not one single molecule of the original compound will make it into the bottle. This, of course, means the HGH is at “maximum strength”, in the homeopathic way of magical thinking.
You’ll surely find some molecules of pig brain and maybe even a few molecules of cow glands, but I suspect they’re not buying the “active” ingredients in shipping container lots. In round numbers, one pig adrenal, one cow thyroid, and one drop of actual HGH would supply their needs well into the future.
I would like to see how they dilute those ingredients, because I doubt they have legions of trained homeopaths succussing bottles against elastic surfaces.
Of course, such dilution requires careful attention to detail, lest a stray molecule make its way into the final product, which surely justifies the punch line:
There is also a $150 “Membership Price”, suggesting a multi-level marketing scam running in parallel. Some rummaging on their website reveals cryptic phrases confirming the suspicion: “Be the change that will inspire others to follow” and “Information on how to become a distributor“.
Ya gotta admire ’em for not even blinking.
A note on commenting: there is zero evidence of efficacy¸ so don’t even try to advocate homeopathy. If it worked, it’d be medicine, not a MLM scam.
The Smell of Molten Projects in the Morning 
Comments
13 responses to “Maximum Strength Homeopathic HGH: Not”
The dilution ratio brings to mind an old story about the clam chowder served in a “greasy spoon” diner. The kitchen had only one clam which was attached to a string. That one clam was dragged through many vats of chowder, thus making the product worthy of the name clam chowder.
Probably the same diner where the chicken swam across the chicken soup …
Where do the *’s on the front lead you? *’s are pesky.
They all point to a footnote in very small type (presumably on the back of the bottle):
Truth in labeling: it doesn’t treat, cure, or prevent anything!
That’s not true: it cures people of having too much money and prevents people from understanding actual science!
Well played, sir!
There’s definitely a lack of “understanding actual science” going on these days …
Weight loss….. to your wallet!
YIkes, I was under the impression that 30X meant 1:30 dilution, not 10^-30! I suppose they’ll let a whiff of HGH loose the next county or so for that.
Penn and Teller did a book on playing with food. No surprise, they’re pretty brutal about homeopathy. (Their recipe that entailed lots of lemon juice along with baking soda sounds kind of fun–if you don’t have to clean the mess.)
Yup, and if “X” dilutions don’t go down fast enough, you could use factor-of-100 “C” dilutions: Dilution scales.
I straight up do not believe they dilute by successive steps, as they should, with all the shaking and whacking. Whatever, I’d still enjoy a factory tour!
I bought a bottle, and have been using it for 6 days. I follow the “Testimonial” page on Facebook. The photos, to me, are bogus. I don’t know if you’ve seen them. They are misleading, different lighting and direction of light, and sometimes hair is different. I also just a few minutes ago, had a post removed, and got a note saying I could not post what I wrote. It was regarding not believing a photo I saw, and why. I also emailed the FDA, and got a good response back. We are led to believe, and innocently led to believe, that FDA registered is a big deal. I know it’s not, and does not mean FDA tested it, which they have not, nor is it an approved product by the FDA. The more I hear, the less inclined I am to pay another $149.00. People DO seem to see results, and perhaps, the inactive ingredients are the cause. I looked them all up. I am thinking, that people expecting many results, also change more in their life style that would account for much of what is happening. Not the gel necessarily.
No doubt about it, you’ve been swindled. Follow the money and you’ll understand why.
Wikipedia sums up the reasons pretty well.
Oh, in addition, I read that an HGH molecule, will not pass through the skin because it’s too large, and, that the molecule is fragile, and when combined with a liquid, perhaps water, it can break apart.
Well, that’s one thing you need not worry about: by definition of a 30x dilution, there are no HGH molecules in the bottle!