The Smell of Molten Projects in the Morning

Ed Nisley's Blog: Shop notes, electronics, firmware, machinery, 3D printing, laser cuttery, and curiosities. Contents: 100% human thinking, 0% AI slop.

Category: Oddities

Who’d’a thunk it?

  • Database Troubles

    So I bought a batch of small carbide bits at Lowe’s: some Dremel burrs and a neat pointed RotoZip engraving bit. Got to the checkout and everything went swimmingly except the RotoZip, which triggered a management override.

    This caused the dreaded price check on Register 6, the only register open at the time. People are four deep behind me and the line is growing.

    Manager shows up, scans his magic power card, types in a small bit of life history, scans the package again. It calls for another management override.

    He re-scans his card, types in a (presumably different) slice of life history, re-scans the package, and the price pops up in bright green for all to see:

    89991 Point Cutting $10,000.00

    “This just isn’t going to happen” sez I. In round numbers, I think it costs 15 bux. Maybe 10, maybe 20.

    The line now extends to the paint counter. I turn to the woman behind me and observe that I don’t think I’ve ever charged a $10,000 item before and that I sure hope it comes with a free yacht.

    The manager laughs, re-scans his card, types in still more life history, re-scans the package, types in yet more life history, and a new price pops up:

    89991 Point Cutting $1.00

    I say “Thank you very much!” He sez “Have a nice day!” The cashier sez “Wow, great deal!” I say “I’m outta here!”

    Hopped on my bike and rode off into the haze.

    I strongly support the “If it doesn’t scan, it’s free” method of price determination, but this is just the second time it’s happened. The first was a clerk who made an on-the-spot decision. This one had management approval!

    I think the price in their database is $10k because of a data entry error, which triggered the first management override.

    Fairly obviously, the database didn’t get fixed today.

    But a good time was had by all!

  • Getting Smarter All The Time

    From the College Board folks who do the SAT:

    http://www.collegeboard.com/press/releases/150054.html:

    Forty-three percent of 2006 college-bound seniors reported grade averages of A+, A, or A-. Ten years ago, the figure was 36 percent, and in 1987, the first year these data were collected in the same manner, the figure was 27 percent. This year’s average grade point average was 3.33, compared with an average GPA of 3.21 in 1996 and 3.07 in 1987.

    Were we-uns really all that dumb back in the day or is something else going on here?

    I think I know the answer to that…

  • OK, I’m a Yokel

    So a while back we were in Providence, walking up the hill in search of breakfast protein (ended up at McD, but that’s another story) and saw in the three windows across the second floor of a tidy brick building:

    Adult Sex Education
    Call [number]

    I sez to my wife, I sez “Hey, we could…” and she sez “No way!” and that’s the end of that.

    Then I find this editorial in their local paper (affectionately known as the ProJo, honest):

    http://www.projo.com/opinion/editorials/content/projo_20060826_26broth.2e12f1d.html

    Providence Mayor David Cicilline is having difficulty cracking down on what some call the world’s oldest profession because state law, incredibly, makes prostitution legal in Rhode Island, as long as it takes place indoors. Only streetwalkers, their pimps, and their customers who flag them down outdoors may be charged.

    Gosh, I guess it’s a good thing we didn’t call that number for some pointers…

    Who knew?

  • Just Guessing: They’ve Never Owned a Fiat

    One of Italy's Greatest Products
    Fiat: One of Italy's Greatest Products

    This from the halls of Arlington Middle School, presumably from Social Studies or Italian Club or some such.

    Somebody needs a course in auto wrenching, methinks.

  • Patroon Parking Only

    Patroon Parking
    Patroon Parking

    Haven’t seen any patroons around here lately, so they must be keeping a low profile. Used to be a bunch of ’em in these parts.

    There were a bunch o’ cars in the lot, come to think of it… maybe they were all in the liquor store.

    Who knew?

  • Pimp His Ride, Economy Division

    Pimp a Van
    Pimp a Van

    Saw this one in the Wal-Mart parking lot. Doncha think the rusty drums provide an understated touch of elegance to the overall effect?

    Yup, it’s a Plymouth Voyager…

    On the way back I witnessed a tricked-out sporty black BMW with low-profile tires doing a slo-mo U-turn on Rt 9 with a dead-flat, rolling-off-the-rim, right front tire. I figure he was heading for the Mobil a few hundred feet back on the corner, but the requisite three left turns would be good for, oh, 800 bucks worth of tire & rim damage.

    On the other paw, stopping & jacking & re-tiring in the middle of Rt 9 wouldn’t work well, either.

  • Ya Gotta Have Tools, Mobile Division

    Once upon a time we delivered a van full of composted leaves to Mary’s Vassar Farms garden plot in the evening.

    There’s a gate at the entrance that was half-closed, but Mary’s never seen it closed & locked, so we drove in and parked by the plot to toss bags. We were done in about 15 minutes, drove back to the gate, and found the Vassar security folks had locked it… with the van in plain sight.

    My guess is that they were busting our chops, but one should never ascribe to malice what can be explained by stupidity.

    We had a phone, but none of the bystanders knew what number to call. The ladies reported that the other gate was also locked. A chain-link fence surrounds the plots.

    What to do?

    The gate hinges were plain old 1″ bolts and nuts, so I figured I could just dismount a gate, drive out, then put the gate back in place. Non-destructive and easy to explain if The Man arrives while I’m at work. Plan B was to just cut the padlocked chain holding the gates together.

    The back of the van has a small “tool” compartment for the jack and suchlike. I long ago added a multi-bit screwdriver set, a medium adjustable wrench (not quite big enough for a 1″ bolt, alas), a Vise-Grip, and similar odds & ends.

    Fortunately, it turned out that the chain around the middle of the gates had two links held together with a 1/4-20 bolt and two nuts. I suspect this sort of thing has happened before, perhaps to someone else with a Vise-Grip.

    Five minutes later, we were outside, the gate was closed & locked, and the tools were back in place.

    Memo to self: add a bigger wrench.