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Archive for September 28th, 2018

Maximum Strength Homeopathic HGH: Not

Spotted at an exhibition for Olde Fartes:

Somaderm homeopathic HGH

Somaderm homeopathic HGH

I think they just blew up the bottle label to human size, with no attention to the resulting pixelation.

One can find Somaderm on the Interwebs, which leads to the “Active Ingredients” list:

Somaderm homeopathic HGH - Active Ingredients

Somaderm homeopathic HGH – Active Ingredients

Looking up their NDC number helps translate the bullshit Latinesque nomenclature:

  • Glandula Suprarenalis Suis = boar adrenal glands
  • Thyroidinum = cow thyroid glands
  • Somatropin = human growth hormone

They’re exceedingly proud of that NDC number, touting “SOMADERM Gel is the only transdermal, FDA registered product”. Indeed, it’s registered, about which the FDC has this to say:

Assigned NDC numbers are not in any way an indication of FDA approval of the product.

and

Marketing Category UNAPPROVED HOMEOPATHIC

With that in mind, consider the dilutions:

  • Glandula Suprarenalis Suis = 1 part per million
  • Thyroidinum = 10 part per billion
  • Somatropin = 1×10-30 = there are no words

Homeopathic “drugs” never list the starting concentration or amounts in the product, but diluting something by a factor of ten-to-the-thirty ensures not one single molecule of the original compound will make it into the bottle. This, of course, means the HGH is at “maximum strength”, in the homeopathic way of magical thinking.

You’ll surely find some molecules of pig brain and maybe even a few molecules of cow glands, but I suspect they’re not buying the “active” ingredients in shipping container lots. In round numbers, one pig adrenal, one cow thyroid, and one drop of actual HGH would supply their needs well into the future.

I would like to see how they dilute those ingredients, because I doubt they have legions of trained homeopaths succussing bottles against elastic surfaces.

Of course, such dilution requires careful attention to detail, lest a stray molecule make its way into the final product, which surely justifies the punch line:

Somaderm homeopathic HGH - Price

Somaderm homeopathic HGH – Price

There is also a $150 “Membership Price”, suggesting a multi-level marketing scam running in parallel. Some rummaging on their website reveals cryptic phrases confirming the suspicion: “Be the change that will inspire others to follow” and “Information on how to become a distributor“.

Ya gotta admire ’em for not even blinking.

A note on commenting: there is zero evidence of efficacy¸ so don’t even try to advocate homeopathy. If it worked, it’d be medicine, not a MLM scam.

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