Leaked Spam Template

A wannabe spammer inadvertently sent me a nice comment-spam template:

{{You must|You need to|You have to|You should} {take advantage of|make the most of|benefit from|take full advantage of} {all the|all of the|each of the|every one of the} software advancements that {happen to be|are actually|are|are generally} {a successful|an effective|an excellent|a prosperous} {Internet marketer|Online marketer|Internet entrepreneur|Affiliate marketer}. {If your|In case your|Should your|When your} work {begins to|starts to|actually starts to} suffer, {the competition|your competition|competition|your competitors} could {leave you|make you|create} {in the|within the|inside the|from the} dust. Show {that you are|that you will be|that you are currently|you are} always {on the|around the|in the|about the} {cutting edge|innovative|leading edge|really advanced}, {and they will|and they can} {learn to|learn how to|figure out how to|discover how to} trust {you and your|both you and your|you and the|your} products.

Multiplying the number of choices together gives a tidy 4.8×109 different comments, each one heartbreakingly close to making sense.

It’s now in my spam collection, along with some other nuggets snatched from the Internet’s outfall pipe

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  1. #1 by madbodger on 2013-03-08 - 09:43

    I wrote a text generator a long time ago (decades) that’s been floating around the ‘net since “the net” was usenet. It’s much more sophisticated than this. You’d think they’d be smart enough to steal something good, but no.

    • #2 by Ed on 2013-03-08 - 10:12

      Even spammers suffer from Not Invented Here syndrome…

      Lately, a few spam comments have been nearly on-point for the post and may have been written by an actual human (i.e., bearing reasonably good English syntax and sematics), but the “user name” and linkies are obviously bogus. They’re getting good enough to pass Akismet’s filters, which is worrisome: it’s now killing 500 spam comments a day with 99.86% accuracy. I get to vote on the rest, which is a Good Thing.

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